Before you speak, there are three things in your life that tell people whether they should listen to what you have to say or disregard you entirely:
Your walk with God;
If your walk with God is a struggle, or you are in rebellion...
If your marriage is poor and you and your spouse do not get along...
If your children have rebelled against your teachings and do not follow the Lord...
Then people will sense the disconnect between what you are saying with your mouth and what your life is saying, and not pay attention.
Leaders will argue that their walk with God, their marriage and their children are all in their private life and are not anybody's business. But that is never true. People know what is happening in those three areas by watching you, your reactions, your body language, your spouse and his/her reactions to you, your children's lives and your children's reactions to you. By looking at those things, they already know...
5 seminars, each two days in length. Approximately 100 pastors are expected, along with their spouses and elders. Day 1 covers "Godly Marriage". Day 2 is about "Raising Godly Children". Our goal is to give pastors what they need, in order to be effective in the ministry. A close walk with God, a good marriage and children following the Lord are essential.
Those 500 pastors will then teach 50,000 people in their churches. Talk about a great EROI - Eternal Return On Investment!
A few days ago, we delivered our first seminar and the response was overwhelmingly positive! My translator, who is also a pastor, called the senior pastor for our next seminar and told him that he must personally contact each pastor who was planning to attend and insist that they bring their spouses and elders, because this seminar was so important.
Each time I have spoken I have taught practical ways...
Mothers are the foundation for their children's domestic success or failure - for generations to come!
This is not sexist - this is statistical. Research shows that mothers, rather than fathers, have a disproportionate impact on their children's future success in the home. It seems that children take their cues on how to act at home from their mothers.
Moms impact generations with their behavior and attitude. Hard work to do it right? Absolutely! Worth it? Are you kidding? Who doesn't want kids with strong marriages and their own successful children!!
The stats prove it!
Physically or emotionally absent fathers have kids with much higher rates of pregnancy, drug use, school drop out and the need for counseling.
Only 2% of children whose fathers do not attend church end up attending church themselves. Only 2%!!
94% of fathers who follow Christ lead their wives and children to Christ.
Though our society would like to say that the impact of fathers and mothers is the same, the statistics prove that the impact of fathers on their children for good or bad is disproportionately greater.
Men - you make a huge difference. But you must choose the type of difference you make!
We can get caught up with work, ministry, other people, other people's children and forget to foster that close relationship with our own.
But here's the truth: if you lose the relationship with your own children then your credibility in life, especially in ministry, is shot.
What do we all want? We want our children to follow the Lord and impact others for Christ. But for that to happen, we must be there for them. They must trust and confide in us as they navigate the waters of growing up and trying to understand what it is to have faith in Christ.
So here are three things you DON'T want to do when you talk with them.
Challenge Your Assumptions!
Why do you do what you do? Why do you believe what you believe?
Most of your actions and your beliefs are based on assumptions that you have held for years. Are those assumptions blessing you and those you serve?
Take the next few days and carefully go through the different areas of your life - marriage, children, family, church, beliefs, business - and ask yourself how you think things are going. When you have thought it through, ask someone in each arena how they think you are doing - some one who will tell you the truth.
If all is well, then no problem. However, if your wife tells you your marriage could be better, or your kids are hesitant to talk, or your church isn't growing and lives aren't changing, then ask yourself, "What assumptions do I have that are not working?"
You may have gotten those assumptions from your parents, a book, something you decided years ago, or from someone else's example, but if they are not...